


fourteen

by sciencebluefeelings



Series: Galaxies Apart [2]
Category: Star Trek: Alternate Original Series (Movies)
Genre: Anxiety, Covid-19 Related, Established Relationship, M/M, Panic Attacks, Telepathic Bond
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-31
Updated: 2020-03-31
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:53:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,601
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23404045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sciencebluefeelings/pseuds/sciencebluefeelings
Summary: Two years ago, Spock waited for Jim. Now it's Jim's turn to wait.
Relationships: James T. Kirk & Leonard "Bones" McCoy, James T. Kirk/Spock Prime
Series: Galaxies Apart [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1683568
Comments: 8
Kudos: 37
Collections: Lock Down Fest





	fourteen

**Author's Note:**

> Sequel to the first fic of the series, but can be read as standalone
> 
> For the Lock Down Fest.

  
"Spock?" Jim crawled to the blanket-wrapped mound on the bed and kissed an exposed shoulder. "Hey, love. You up yet?"  
  
Spock grumbled and pulled his blanket further over himself, until only the ends of his white hair were peeking over the top. Jim chuckled and nuzzled the exposed strands with his chin. "Spock," he murmured. "Aren't you hungry? The dinner's gonna be over in less than an hour. If you're going, you need to get up now, babe." Jim tugged the edge of the blanket down, and Spock blinked one exasperated eye open. It slid back shut and Spock turned his head away.  
  
Jim stroked Spock's leg and got up to get dressed in his formal wear. The diplomatic conference had started earlier today, but there had not been any formal talks yet. Spock was one of the representing ambassadors, but instead of staying at the exquisite hotel planet side, he had opted to stay with his bondmate aboard the _Enterprise_. Spock couldn't stay awake as long as he used to be able, and right now he was still adjusting to the time differences.  
  
Jim moved to leave, but he couldn't ignore the visual of Spock sprawled in his blankets, gorgeous skin bared to the faint light. Jim risked creasing his uniform to give Spock one last kiss and caress. "I'll be back soon," he promised.  
  
"Love you, Jim," was the sleepy rough reply.  
  
Jim's throat went tight. Something about the way Spock said that made it happen every time. "Yeah. Love you too, sweetheart."  
  


  
  
Jim should've known the peaceful proceedings were too good to be true.  
  
He cursed internally as diplomats screamed and ran for the exits. Smoke was spreading, and there was a crater in the middle of the floor with fragments everywhere from the sudden blast.  
  
"Oh, god." Jim stared in horror at one of the Vulcan ambassadors that had collapsed near him. He helped the ambassador out of the smoking room to join the others. Jim directed the security officers to secure the area before turning back to the crowd of diplomats. "Bones?"  
  
"I'm here, Jim." Bones already had his medicorder out.  
  
Jim had never been more relieved for his friend's paranoia. "Bones, we need you over here!" One of the security officers was already performing CPR on the Vulcan. Jim suddenly heard a shout to his left. A security officer was hurriedly bringing over another collapsed Vulcan.  
  
Bones cursed loudly as he gave orders to a nearby nurse and another doctor. "Under no circumstances is anyone to enter or leave this planet. Is anyone else reacting to the smoke?"  
  
If anyone had the answer, Bones didn't hear it because he was already preoccupied with the Vulcans in front of him. He had already called the medical transport.  
  
The ambulance siren echoed off the walls of the buildings. Jim regretted ever coming down for dinner.  
  
They quickly determined the explosion had been an accidental chemical reaction involving one of the alien diplomats and the bowl of punch. The resulting compound that had permeated the air was harmless to most, but it lingered on skin and clothing - everything. And it was currently sending the older Vulcan diplomats into cardiac arrest. Bones couldn't treat the Vulcans because he himself was covered in the chemical - he had to let the unaffected staff care for them. Thankfully, most of the diplomats had opted not to attend dinner this first night, like Spock.  
  
God. If Spock had inhaled the smoke - he was the oldest of the Vulcan diplomats by far. Jim didn't even want to think about it.  
  
He sighed. Things could've been way worse, he supposed. He wasn't injured or feeling sick. He was safely in a nice hotel room, freshly showered and wrapped in a heavy blanket. The strange chemical couldn't be removed from their skin, but Commander Spock had estimated it would oxidize into a non-potent form within the next two weeks.  
  
Jim called his Spock and waited for the video to connect. Spock's face filled the screen, his worried brown eyes framed by his wire glasses. " _Ashaya_."  
  
Suddenly Jim was overcome with a strange emotion he couldn't pinpoint. "Hi, sweetheart."  
  
" _Are you okay, Jim?_ " Spock looked alarmed by Jim's expression, unattractively scrunched up to keep from bawling like a goddamn idiot.  
  
Jim choked out a laugh. "It's nothing."  
  
" _No, it isn't,_ " Spock said frankly.  
  
Jim ducked his head. He confessed, "We were together less than two hours ago and I'm looking at you right now, but - but I miss you already."  
  
" _Oh, Jim._ " Spock's voice was soft. " _I miss you as well. I heard the conference has been delayed. Are the others alright?_ "  
  
Jim nodded. "The three Vulcan diplomats that came in contact with the chemical have stabilized. They'll be in recovery for a long time but they're still alive. We've contacted the other Vulcan diplomats and determined their locations. The unaffected diplomats are all leaving tonight or tomorrow with multiple precautions. The Enterprise crew members that had come in contact with the smoke or with a crew member affected by the smoke have been quarantined to the planet. Gotta wait out the two weeks."  
  
" _I see._ " Spock smiled at Jim. " _I will occupy your quarters until then._ "  
  
Jim felt a spark of relief above the wavering tension. "You'll stay and wait?"  
  
" _Jim,_ " Spock scolded gently. " _You did not think I would abandon you like this?_ "  
  
"Not - completely." Jim wished he had a pillow or something to hold onto. Another spiraling thought had shame heating the tips of his ears. "God. Now I'm thinking about how I'll have to sleep by myself and - fuck." He didn't want to sleep alone. This was so stupid. What was he, four years old?  
  
Thankfully Spock didn't make any sort of comment. He adjusted the screen from his end. " _I must take a sonic shower briefly. Shall I call you back once I am done?_ "  
  
_Couldn't you stay online?_ Jim smiled weakly. "Sounds good. I'll wait for you."  
  
Spock disconnected. Jim should've found something to do to occupy himself in the meantime, but he found himself unable to. He sat and waited in silence.  
  


  
  
Jim and Spock texted frequently, and called every night. It was fine. It was almost like any other day of their mostly long-distance relationship, except Jim was here and Spock was in his room. Jim played board games with Bones (who somehow never ceased to drag his ass every time) or just sat and watched lousy soap operas with him. Even if his friend wasn't actually saying anything, just having him within sight was incredibly reassuring.  
  
But even Bones wasn't enough to help with the unsettling feeling that grew inside Jim every day, a feeling that expanded every time Spock disconnected or Jim lay in the strange bed without Spock's scent.  
  
Jim caved the fifth night. It was like being at the Academy all over again. Jim snuck into Bones' room across the hallway and burrowed under his covers next to him. When Jim was a cadet, Bones would always sleepily make room for him before falling asleep again. He did the same thing now. Jim listened to his light snoring and smelled his aftershave.  
  
Bones didn't mention anything when Jim came back again, and again.  
  
It might've been the ninth day, or the tenth, Jim didn't remember. Jim was in a call with Spock, but he couldn't focus. He wasn't sure what he was saying, or if he was even speaking. Jim thought Spock might be saying something, but he couldn't be certain. Everything was distant around him. Then a hand on his shoulder made Jim scream.  
  
"It's me," Bones said grimly, helping Jim up from where he had fallen off his chair onto the floor. Jim's chest heaved and he realized he couldn't breathe.  
  
"Spock," Jim managed to get out.  
  
"Uh huh." Bones tossed aside the whirring medicorder and put his hands on Jim's face, forcing Jim to maintain eye contact with him. "Take a deep breath through your nose, Jim. I'm gonna count to three, and you're gonna hold. One. Two."  
  
Jim struggled to follow Bones' calm orders, but his frazzled mind was going in every direction.  
  
"Three. Exhale slowly through your mouth. Good. Relax, we're doing that again. Breath through your nose." Bones kept his hands on Jim's face until Jim had finally calmed down enough to breathe again. The strange indistinguishable feeling from before simmered under Jim's skin.  
  
Jim looked up at his computer screen. Spock was still holding a comm in his trembling hand. " _You were not responding to me,_ " Spock whispered.  
  
Shit. Jim just had a fucking panic attack in front of his helpless bondmate. He'd never had one in his life before.  
  
"It's okay, Ambassador," Bones said evenly, helping Jim sit on the bed. "Jim's all right. Anxiety just spiked. According to the medicorder readings, I think the chemical is temporarily messing with his temporal lobe."  
  
"Is it the bond?" Jim had to resist the urge to press forward into the screen, as if that would solve anything. "I - I don't understand why it feels like this."  
  
Bones looked warily from Jim to Spock. "I'm not sure, Jim. But it'll be four more days, and then it's over. Promise."  
  
"Four - no. No, I can't wait that long. Spock's gonna get tired of me. It's already been two weeks, he'll leave. What's good about me, Bones? Nothing. Why's he still - why hasn't Spock left yet?"  
  
Spock's voice was grim as he stood. " _Doctor-_ "  
  
"No way in hell," Bones interrupted Spock. "There's no way you're coming here or Jim is going back up there. Your cardiac system will melt like rock touching a Horta."  
  
Bones' words momentarily cleared the disarray of Jim's mind. Spock wasn't allowed to die. That wasn't an option.  
  
Spock countered, " _Doctor, I could help if I am outfitted with proper PPE. Jim-_ "  
  
"No," Jim said, even as every cell of his being screamed the opposite. "Spock, don't."  
  
Bones sighed. "Ambassador, I'm sorry. I know this is hard for you too, but we can't risk it." Jim made eye contact with Bones, and saw the unasked question.  
  
Jim put a hand on Bones' arm. "Let me have a few minutes alone with Spock?"  
  
"I don't know if that's a good idea, Jim."  
  
"I promise to call you if I need something." Jim urged Bones out of the room. "I'll let you know when I'm done."  
  
Spock waited as Jim sat back in front of the computer screen. Jim looked up at him through watery eyes. "Spock - please."  
  
" _What is it, Jim?_ "  
  
Jim covered his face. "God. I'm being clingy as shit."  
  
" _Oh, love._ " Spock's voice was patient, too patient. Jim's all brash and loudness and passion, he didn't understand how he'd never heard Spock raise his voice. Not even once. " _Jim, of course I love you. It is a decision I renew daily, and I do not plan to stop._ "  
  
"I wish I could read your mind like you can. You always know what I need, but me - Spock, you deserve so much more."  
  
" _Jim_ ," Spock said. " _Ask me what I desire_."  
  
Jim's breath shuddered, but he collected himself and drew his spine up straight. "Tell me what you want, love. I'll do anything, I'll try my best to get it for you."  
  
" _And you question why I love you, ashaya._ " Spock pressed a hand to the screen. " _I want you. And that can only be fulfilled if you take care of yourself these last four days. Can you do that for me?_ "  
  
"I - I don't know." But Jim knew that Spock saw, recognized the grim look in his eyes. He'd endure anything for Spock, even being separated from him.  
  
Jim let Bones back into the room, and Spock smiled at him. " _I appreciate what you've done very much, Doctor._ "  
  
Bones was blushing a rare soft pink. "Of course, Ambassador."  
  
Jim was in Bones' bed again that night, and as Bones snored quietly Jim repeated the number of remaining days to himself, told himself to sleep. If he slept, tomorrow would be here sooner, and the remaining days would be decreased by one.  
  


  
  
The tingle of the transporter faded and Jim transferred to the containment chamber with Bones close behind. They were the last crew members of the _Enterprise_ to beam up. Commander Spock greeted them before speaking to the medical officer scanning Jim and Bones. His words were slightly muffled by his mask.  
  
Jim waited anxiously as they were scanned for any lingering traces of the deadly chemical before being pronounced clean. Jim exited the chamber to be swept up into a tight embrace. Jim clung blindly. He had already recognized the feeling of those arms around him.  
  
"Oh, Jim." Spock's fingers were pressed to his cheek. "Oh, love. There has been incredible damage to your side of the bond."  
  
"My scanners never picked up on that." Bones sounded distressed. "Is that's what's been affecting the other Vulcans? Can Jim be healed, Ambassador?"  
  
Jim felt light probing in the back of his skull. "Yes, but it will require time to heal gradually. As I have stated, the damage is severe."  
  
"Bed rest for you, then, Jim. Doctor's orders." Bones grasped Jim's hand before leaving briskly for Medbay, probably to inform the hospital still on the planet on how to treat the Vulcan diplomats.  
  
Spock led Jim up to their room, and Jim relaxed instantly feeling the familiar presence of his quarters around him. Spock guided Jim to the bed, and Jim lay on his back comfortably under his own comforter as Spock pressed his worn fingers back to Jim's meld points. "Take a deep breath," Spock warned.  
  
" _Fuck!_ " Jim spasmed as a bolt of agony went through his entire body. It vanished before the pain began to build slowly in the form of a colossal, throbbing headache. "Aghhh. Fuck my entire existence."  
  
Spock was pressing a soothing, cool hand to Jim's forehead, stroking his chest and arm. "Just a little longer. This necessary for the healing process to conclude."  
  
"The fucking irony. Come back home and get prescribed more pain." Jim accepted a kiss of apology to the corner of his mouth. Spock briefly left to bring a cold compress, which helped marginally with the throbbing.  
  
The night passed slowly. The headache decreased in increments. Spock was curled under the blankets next to Jim now, his head on Jim's shoulder. Jim ran his fingers through his hair before hugging him closer. "You're wearing my shirt," Jim observed with sleepy satisfaction.  
  
"And your boxers as well."  
  
Jim snorted. "Do anything fun while you were up here?"  
  
Spock shrugged. "My thoughts were preoccupied."  
  
"So, what? Hung out in my room all those days?"  
  
"Perhaps. There was nowhere more favorable on the ship. I was waiting for you, after all."  
  
Jim sighed. Now that the headache was almost gone, Jim's realizing the strange sensation he had felt was the absence of his connection to Spock. He felt it with all its potent warmth now, like a sweet, hot drink.  
  
"Yes," Spock agreed, placing his hands over Jim's face. "Bond damage like this would have been enough to incapacitate a bonded Vulcan permanently. If it were me, I do not think I would have been able to survive."  
  
Jim buried his face into Spock's neck. "Good thing it wasn't you, then."  
  
Spock kissed Jim's forehead and placed an ankle over Jim's. "Sleep, love. No nightmares tonight."  
  
"The meadow," Jim murmured. "I like picking flowers for you there."  
  
Spock hummed in agreement.  
  
The flowers in their shared dreams were the color of happiness.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading! (or reaching the bottom of the page ^^) I appreciate all kudos and any form of comments! especially the ones w emoji spam 💖💖✨✨
> 
> If you enjoyed the hurt/comfort in this fic, [you might like this hurt/comfort fic of Ambassador Spock accidentally muzzled in an altercation gone wrong (Rating is M, read the warnings and stay safe!)](https://archiveofourown.org/works/20810759)


End file.
